that we are human and we do make mistakes.
Sometimes the funniest things in life are not those we make up but those that happen to us. We say things, write things and do things that we think are correct but somehow they come out different. Sometimes it's embarrassing for us and surprising for others, but often it's too funny to be forgotten. Here is my collection of Life's Bloopers.
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Accident Reports We build bodies that last a lifetime.The Bible According to Kids The Jews were a proud people and, throughout history, they had trouble with unsympathetic Genitals.Church Bulletins The concert held in Fellowship Hall was a great success. Special thanks are due to the minister's daughter, who laboured the whole evening at the piano, which as usual fell upon her.Courtroom Bloopers Q: Do you drink when you're on duty? A: I don't drink when I'm on duty, unless I come on duty drunk.English Misuse in Signs From a Japanese information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner: "Cooles and Heates: If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself."Family Feud Q: Name something you do in the bathroom. A: Decorate.Foreign Brands Hornyphon (video recorder, Austria)Instruction Labels On a Nytol (a sleep aid): "Warning: may cause drowsiness."Newspaper Headlines 20-Year Friendship Ends at AltarOn the Beat "In God we trust, all others are suspect."School Excuse Notes Please excuse Jimmy for being. It was his father's fault.Things Kids Say (Regarding how was kissing invented?) "I know one reason that kissing was created. It makes you feel warm all over, and they didn't always have electric heat or fireplaces or even stoves in their houses." I am forwarding my marriage certificate and 6 children. I had seven but one died which was baptised on a half sheet of paper.What the Doctors Wrote Patient was released to outpatient department without dressing.Young Scientists Men are mammals and women are femammals. |