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CATEGORIES
Accident Reports I told the police I was not injured, but upon removing my hair, I found that I had a fractured skull. Ad Typos Our experienced Mom will care of your child. Fenced yard, meals, and smacks included.The Bible According to Kids One of the opossums was St. Matthew, who was by profession a taximan.Church Bulletins This week's saints include a French woman (Teresa, the Little Flower), a Swedish woman (Bridget), an Italian man (Francis of Assisi), a German man (Bruno), a Jewess from the Holy Land (Mary, God's Mother). They include single people and married people. Bridget was a wife and mother. Mary was a virgin and virgin mother. If they could do it, so can we.Courtroom Bloopers Q: Are you married? A: No, I'm divorced. Q: And what did your husband do before you divorced him? A: A lot of things I didn't know about.English Misuse in Signs In a Norwegian cocktail lounge: "Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar."Family Feud Q: Name a song with moon in the title. A: Blue Suede Moon.Foreign Brands Zit (lemon-lime soft drink, Greece)Instruction Labels On Marks & Spencer bread pudding: "Product will be hot after heating."Newspaper Headlines Queen Mary Having Bottom ScrapedOn the Beat "You can't outrun a radio."School Excuse Notes Irving was absent this morning because he missed his bust.Things Kids Say (Regarding when is it okay to kiss someone?) "When they're rich." - Pam, age 7Welfare Requests I cannot get sick pay. I have six children can you tell me why?What the Doctors Wrote She is numb from her toes down.Young Scientists As the rain forests in the Amazon are shrinking, so are the Indians. |
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