that we are human and we do make mistakes.
Sometimes the funniest things in life are not those we make up but those that happen to us. We say things, write things and do things that we think are correct but somehow they come out different. Sometimes it's embarrassing for us and surprising for others, but often it's too funny to be forgotten. Here is my collection of Life's Bloopers.
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Accident Reports Man, honest. Will take anything.The Bible According to Kids The fifth commandment is humour thy mother and father.Church Bulletins Please join us as we show support for Amy & Alan who is preparing for the girth of their first child.Courtroom Bloopers Q: Did you ever stay all night with this man in New York? A: I refuse to answer that question. Q: Did you ever stay all night with this man in Chicago? A: I refuse to answer that question. Q: Did you ever stay all night with this man in Miami? A: No.English Misuse in Signs In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from Russian Orthodox monastery: "You are welcome to visit the cemetary where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists and writers are buried daily except Thursday."Family Feud Q: Name an item of clothing worn by the Three Musketeers. A: A horse.Foreign Brands Superglans (car wax, Netherlands)Instruction Labels On a bag of Fritos: "You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside."Newspaper Headlines Dealers Will Hear Car Talk at NoonOn the Beat "In God we trust, all others we run NCIC."School Excuse Notes Please excuse my son's tardiness. I forgot to wake him and didn't find him till I started making the beds.Things Kids Say (Regarding some surefire ways to make a person fall in love with you) "Shake your hips and hope for the best." I am forwarding my marriage certificate and 6 children. I had seven but one died which was baptised on a half sheet of paper.What the Doctors Wrote When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room.Young Scientists Men are mammals and women are femammals. |