that we are human and we do make mistakes.
Sometimes the funniest things in life are not those we make up but those that happen to us. We say things, write things and do things that we think are correct but somehow they come out different. Sometimes it's embarrassing for us and surprising for others, but often it's too funny to be forgotten. Here is my collection of Life's Bloopers.
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Accident Reports Stock up and save. Limit: one.The Bible According to Kids St. John, the blacksmith, dumped water on his head.Church Bulletins The church is glad to have with us today as our guest minister the Rev. Green who has Mrs. Green with him. After the service we request that all remain in the sanctuary for the Hanging of the Greens.Courtroom Bloopers Q: Did he kill you?English Misuse in Signs In an Austrian hotel catering to skiers: "Not to perambulate the corriders during the hours of repose in the boots of ascension."Family Feud Q: Name something in the garden that's green. A: Shed.Foreign Brands Pansy (men's underwear, China)Instruction Labels On a hotel-provided shower cap: "Fits one head."Newspaper Headlines Grandmother of Eight Makes Hole in OneOn the Beat "Warning! You want a warning? Okay, I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket."School Excuse Notes Please excuse my son's tardiness. I forgot to wake him and didn't find him till I started making the beds.Things Kids Say (Regarding how to make love endure) "Don't forget your wife's name. That will mess up the love." I am glad to report that my husband who is missing is dead.What the Doctors Wrote The patient experienced sudden onset of severe shortness of breath with a picture of acute pulmonary edema at home while having sex which gradually deteriorated in the emergency room.Young Scientists Men are mammals and women are femammals. |