This web page is dedicated to those who remind us that we are human and we do make mistakes.

Sometimes the funniest things in life are not those we make up but those that happen to us. We say things, write things and do things that we think are correct but somehow they come out different. Sometimes it's embarrassing for us and surprising for others, but often it's too funny to be forgotten. Here is my collection of Life's Bloopers.

12193 Home > CATEGORIES Accident Reports I had been driving for forty years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident. Ad Typos Wanted: Hair-cutter. Excellent growth potential. The Bible According to Kids Jesus was born because Mary had an emasculate contraption. Church Bulletins The 1991 Spring Council Retreat will be hell May 10 & 11. Pastor is on vacation. Massages can be given to the church secretary. Courtroom Bloopers Q: You say the stairs went down to the basement? A: Yes. Q: And these stairs, did they go up also? English Misuse in Signs In a Tokyo shop: "Our nylons cost more than common, but you'll find they are best in the long run." Family Feud Q: Name a famous brother and sister. A: Bonnie & Clyde. Foreign Brands Ass Glue (blood tonic from donkey parts, China) Instruction Labels On a hair dryer: "Do not use while sleeping." Newspaper Headlines Panda Mating Fails—Veterinarian Takes Over On the Beat "That says POLICE, not taxi!" School Excuse Notes Irving was absent this morning because he missed his bust. Things Kids Say (Regarding how can you tell if two adults eating dinner at a restaurant are in love?) "See if the man has lipstick on his face."  - Sandra, age 7 Welfare Requests I am writing the welfare department to say that my baby was born two years old. When do I get my money? What the Doctors Wrote Patient was becoming more demented with urinary frequency. Young Scientists Parallel lines never meet unless you bend one or both of them.

Life's Bloopers was last updated on 2010 March 12