This web page is dedicated to those who remind us
that we are human and we do make mistakes.

Sometimes the funniest things in life are not those we make up but those that happen to us. We say things, write things and do things that we think are correct but somehow they come out different. Sometimes it's embarrassing for us and surprising for others, but often it's too funny to be forgotten. Here is my collection of Life's Bloopers.


4363

Home >


CATEGORIES

Accident Reports
An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished.

Ad Typos
Stock up and save. Limit: one.

The Bible According to Kids
St. John, the blacksmith, dumped water on his head.

Church Bulletins
The church is glad to have with us today as our guest minister the Rev. Green who has Mrs. Green with him. After the service we request that all remain in the sanctuary for the Hanging of the Greens.

Courtroom Bloopers
Q: Did he kill you?

English Misuse in Signs
In an Austrian hotel catering to skiers: "Not to perambulate the corriders during the hours of repose in the boots of ascension."

Family Feud
Q: Name something in the garden that's green.
A: Shed.

Foreign Brands
Pansy (men's underwear, China)

Instruction Labels
On a hotel-provided shower cap: "Fits one head."

Newspaper Headlines
Grandmother of Eight Makes Hole in One

On the Beat
"Warning! You want a warning? Okay, I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket."

School Excuse Notes
Please excuse my son's tardiness. I forgot to wake him and didn't find him till I started making the beds.

Things Kids Say
(Regarding how to make love endure)
"Don't forget your wife's name. That will mess up the love."  - Erin, age 8

Welfare Requests
I am glad to report that my husband who is missing is dead.

What the Doctors Wrote
The patient experienced sudden onset of severe shortness of breath with a picture of acute pulmonary edema at home while having sex which gradually deteriorated in the emergency room.

Young Scientists
Men are mammals and women are femammals.


 
Life's Bloopers was last updated on 2010 March 12