This web page is dedicated to those who remind us that we are human and we do make mistakes.

Sometimes the funniest things in life are not those we make up but those that happen to us. We say things, write things and do things that we think are correct but somehow they come out different. Sometimes it's embarrassing for us and surprising for others, but often it's too funny to be forgotten. Here is my collection of Life's Bloopers.

4631 Home > CATEGORIES Accident Reports I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way. Ad Typos Wanted. Widower with school-age children requires person to assume general housekeeping duties. Must be capable of contributing to growth of family. The Bible According to Kids The seventh commandment is thou shalt not admit adultery. Church Bulletins Next Sunday Mrs. Vinson will be soloist for the morning service. The pastor will then speak on "It's a Terrible Experience." Courtroom Bloopers Q: Were you aquainted with the deceased? A: Yes, sir. Q: Before or after he died? English Misuse in Signs On the menu of a Swiss restaurant: "Our wines leave you nothing to hope for." Family Feud Q: Name something a blind person might use. A: A sword. Foreign Brands Pshitt (soft drink, France) Instruction Labels On Boots children's cough medicine: "Do not drive car or operate machinery." Newspaper Headlines Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted On the Beat "Uh... yes Chief, it only appeared as if I wasn't paying attention to your speech. Actually, you inspired me to meditate on the mission statement and envision a new paradigm." School Excuse Notes Please excuse Tom for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea and his boots leak. Things Kids Say (Regarding the personal qualities you need to have in order to be a good lover) "One of you should know how to write a cheque. Because, even if you have tons of love, there is still going to be a lot of bills."  - Ava, age 8 Welfare Requests In accordance with your instructions, I have given birth to twins in the enclosed envelope. What the Doctors Wrote I have suggested that he loosen his pants before standing, and then, when he stands with the help of his wife, they should fall to the floor. Young Scientists Methane, a greenhouse gas, comes from the burning of trees and cows.

Life's Bloopers was last updated on 2010 March 12