that we are human and we do make mistakes.
Sometimes the funniest things in life are not those we make up but those that happen to us. We say things, write things and do things that we think are correct but somehow they come out different. Sometimes it's embarrassing for us and surprising for others, but often it's too funny to be forgotten. Here is my collection of Life's Bloopers.
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Accident Reports And now, the Superstore—unequaled in size, unmatched in variety, unrivaled inconvenience.The Bible According to Kids Solomon, one of David's sons, has 300 wives and 700 porcupines.Church Bulletins Offertory: "Jesus Paid It All"Courtroom Bloopers Q: What is the meaning of sperm being present? A: It indicates intercourse. Q: Male sperm? A: That is the only kind I know.English Misuse in Signs In a Tokyo bar: "Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts."Family Feud Q: Name something that flies that doesn't have an engine. A: A bicycle with wings.Foreign Brands Blue Peter (canned fish, Norway)Instruction Labels On Boots children's cough medicine: "Do not drive car or operate machinery."Newspaper Headlines Panda Mating Fails—Veterinarian Takes OverOn the Beat "You can't outrun a radio."School Excuse Notes Mary could not come to school because she has been bothered by very close veins.Things Kids Say (Regarding concerning the proper age to get married) "Eighty-four! Because at that age, you don't have to work anymore, and you can spend all your time loving each other." Please find for certain if my husband is dead. The man I am now living with can't do anything until he knows.What the Doctors Wrote The skin was moist and dry.Young Scientists A liter is a nest of young baby animals. |