that we are human and we do make mistakes.
Sometimes the funniest things in life are not those we make up but those that happen to us. We say things, write things and do things that we think are correct but somehow they come out different. Sometimes it's embarrassing for us and surprising for others, but often it's too funny to be forgotten. Here is my collection of Life's Bloopers.
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Accident Reports Girl wanted to assist magician in cutting-off-head illusion. Blue Cross and salary.The Bible According to Kids Moses led the Hebrews to the Red Sea, where they made unleavened bread, which is bread made without any ingredients.Church Bulletins A songfest was hell at the Methodist church Wednesday.Courtroom Bloopers Q: Mrs. Jones, is your appearance this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney? A: No. This is how I dress when I go to work.English Misuse in Signs In a Bangkok dry cleaners: "Drop your trousers here for best results."Family Feud Q: Name a food that can be brown or white. A: Potato.Foreign Brands Homo Sausage (beef jerky, Japan)Instruction Labels On packaging for a Rowento iron: "Do not iron clothes on body."Newspaper Headlines Farmer Bill Dies in HouseOn the Beat "God must love stupid people, 'cause he sure made a lot of them."School Excuse Notes Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels.Things Kids Say (Regarding how do people in love typically behave?) "All of a sudden, the people get movies fever so they can sit together in the dark." Please find for certain if my husband is dead. The man I am now living with can't do anything until he knows.What the Doctors Wrote By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart had stopped, and he was feeling better.Young Scientists Mushrooms always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas. |