This web page is dedicated to those who remind us
that we are human and we do make mistakes.

Sometimes the funniest things in life are not those we make up but those that happen to us. We say things, write things and do things that we think are correct but somehow they come out different. Sometimes it's embarrassing for us and surprising for others, but often it's too funny to be forgotten. Here is my collection of Life's Bloopers.


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Accident Reports
I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law and headed over the embankment.

Ad Typos
Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once, you'll never go anywhere again.

The Bible According to Kids
In the first book of the Bible, Guinness, God got tired of creating the world, so he took the Sabbath off.

Church Bulletins
Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community.

Courtroom Bloopers
Q: Are you married?
A: No, I'm divorced.
Q: And what did your husband do before you divorced him?
A: A lot of things I didn't know about.

English Misuse in Signs
From a Japanese information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner: "Cooles and Heates: If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself."

Family Feud
Q: Name something you wear on the beach.
A: A deckchair.

Foreign Brands
Krapp (toilet paper, Sweden)

Instruction Labels
On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only."

Newspaper Headlines
12 On Their Way to Cruise Among Dead in Plane Crash

On the Beat
"The more we sweat in training, the less we bleed on the streets."

School Excuse Notes
Dear School: Please eckuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33.

Things Kids Say
(Regarding some surefire ways to make a person fall in love with you)
"Yell out that you love them at the top of your lungs... and don't worry if their parents are right there."  - Manuel, age 8

Welfare Requests
Mrs. Jones has not had any clothes for two years and has been visited regularly by the clergy.

What the Doctors Wrote
Since she can't get pregnant with her husband, I thought you would like to work her up.

Young Scientists
The earth makes a resolution every 24 hours.

Life's Bloopers was last updated on 2010 March 12