This web page is dedicated to those who remind us that we are human and we do make mistakes.

Sometimes the funniest things in life are not those we make up but those that happen to us. We say things, write things and do things that we think are correct but somehow they come out different. Sometimes it's embarrassing for us and surprising for others, but often it's too funny to be forgotten. Here is my collection of Life's Bloopers.

9769 Home > CATEGORIES Accident Reports A truck backed through my windshield into my wife's face. Ad Typos Three-year-old teacher need for pre-school. Experience preferred. The Bible According to Kids Adam and Eve were created from an apple tree. Church Bulletins Today's Sermon: HOW MUCH CAN A MAN DRINK? with hymns from a full choir. Courtroom Bloopers Q: When he went, had you gone and had she, if she wanted to and were able, for the time being excluding all the restraints on her not to go, gone also, would he have brought you, meaning you and she, with him to the station? Mr. Brooks: Objection. That question should be taken out and shot. English Misuse in Signs In a Rome laundry: "Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time." Family Feud Q: Name a bird with a long neck. A: Naomi Campbell. Foreign Brands Polio (detergent, Czechoslovakia) Instruction Labels On a Korean kitchen knife: "Warning keep out of children." Newspaper Headlines Diaper Market Bottoms Out On the Beat "Some people are meant to be cops, and some people are meant to call the cops." School Excuse Notes My daughter was absdent yesterday because she was tired. She spent the weekend with the Marines. Things Kids Say (Regarding concerning why love happens between two particular people) "No one is sure why it happens, but I heard it has something to do with how you smell. That's why perfume and deodorant are so popular."  - Mae, age 9 Welfare Requests In accordance with your instructions, I have given birth to twins in the enclosed envelope. What the Doctors Wrote The patient experienced sudden onset of severe shortness of breath with a picture of acute pulmonary edema at home while having sex which gradually deteriorated in the emergency room. Young Scientists Involuntary muscles are not as willing as voluntary ones.

Life's Bloopers was last updated on 2010 March 12