This web page is dedicated to those who remind us
that we are human and we do make mistakes.

Sometimes the funniest things in life are not those we make up but those that happen to us. We say things, write things and do things that we think are correct but somehow they come out different. Sometimes it's embarrassing for us and surprising for others, but often it's too funny to be forgotten. Here is my collection of Life's Bloopers.


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Accident Reports
An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished.

Ad Typos
Christmas tag-sale. Handmade gifts for the hard-to-find person.

The Bible According to Kids
Solomon, one of David's sons, has 300 wives and 700 porcupines.

Church Bulletins
Don't let worry kill you—let the church help.

Courtroom Bloopers
Q: Sir, what is your IQ?
A: Well, I can see pretty well, I think.

English Misuse in Signs
In a Belgrade hotel elevator: "To move the cabin, push button for wishing floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press a number of wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by national order."

Family Feud
Q: Name a number you have to memorize.
A: 7.

Foreign Brands
Superglans (car wax, Netherlands)

Instruction Labels
On a bag of Fritos: "You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside."

Newspaper Headlines
Chou Remains Cremated

On the Beat
"Yes sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I am the shift supervisor?"

School Excuse Notes
Please excuse Mary for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.

Things Kids Say
(Regarding how do people in love typically behave?)
"Mooshy... like puppy dogs... except puppy dogs don't wag their tails nearly as much."  - Arnold, age 10

Welfare Requests
I am forwarding my marriage certificate and 6 children. I had seven but one died which was baptised on a half sheet of paper.

What the Doctors Wrote
The patient has no past history of suicides.

Young Scientists
As the rain forests in the Amazon are shrinking, so are the Indians.


 
Life's Bloopers was last updated on 2010 March 12