This web page is dedicated to those who remind us
that we are human and we do make mistakes.

Sometimes the funniest things in life are not those we make up but those that happen to us. We say things, write things and do things that we think are correct but somehow they come out different. Sometimes it's embarrassing for us and surprising for others, but often it's too funny to be forgotten. Here is my collection of Life's Bloopers.


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Accident Reports
The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a big mouth.

Ad Typos
Wanted: Hair-cutter. Excellent growth potential.

The Bible According to Kids
In the first book of the Bible, Guinness, God got tired of creating the world, so he took the Sabbath off.

Church Bulletins
The concert held in Fellowship Hall was a great success. Special thanks are due to the minister's daughter, who laboured the whole evening at the piano, which as usual fell upon her.

Courtroom Bloopers
Q: How far apart were the vehicles at the time of the collision?

English Misuse in Signs
In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from Russian Orthodox monastery: "You are welcome to visit the cemetary where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists and writers are buried daily except Thursday."

Family Feud
Q: Name a famous brother and sister.
A: Bonnie & Clyde.

Foreign Brands
Krapp (toilet paper, Sweden)

Instruction Labels
On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap."

Newspaper Headlines
William Kelly, 87, was Fed Secretary

On the Beat
"The more we sweat in training, the less we bleed on the streets."

School Excuse Notes
Mary could not come to school because she has been bothered by very close veins.

Things Kids Say
(Regarding )
"Marriage is when you get to keep your girl and don't have to give her back to her parents!"  - Eric, age 6

Welfare Requests
I cannot get sick pay. I have six children can you tell me why?

What the Doctors Wrote
While in the ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent home.

Young Scientists
As the rain forests in the Amazon are shrinking, so are the Indians.

Life's Bloopers was last updated on 2010 March 12