This web page is dedicated to those who remind us
that we are human and we do make mistakes.

Sometimes the funniest things in life are not those we make up but those that happen to us. We say things, write things and do things that we think are correct but somehow they come out different. Sometimes it's embarrassing for us and surprising for others, but often it's too funny to be forgotten. Here is my collection of Life's Bloopers.


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Accident Reports
My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle.

Ad Typos
Our experienced Mom will care of your child. Fenced yard, meals, and smacks included.

The Bible According to Kids
King David fought with the Finkelsteins, a race of people who lived in the Biblical times.

Church Bulletins
The rosebud on the altar this morning is to announce the birth of David A. Belzer, the sin of Rev. and Mrs. Julius Belzer.

Courtroom Bloopers
Q: (Showing man picture.) That's you?
A: Yes, sir.
Q: And you were present when the picture was taken, right?

English Misuse in Signs
A sign posted in Germany's Black Forest: "It is strictly forbidden on our black forest camping site that people of different sex, for instance, men and women, live together in one tent unless they are married with each other for that purpose."

Family Feud
Q: Name a famous Scotsman.
A: Jock.

Foreign Brands
Hornyphon (video recorder, Austria)

Instruction Labels
On a bag of Fritos: "You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside."

Newspaper Headlines
County Officials to Talk Rubbish

On the Beat
"Listen with your ears, not with your mouth."

School Excuse Notes
Please excuse Tom for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea and his boots leak.

Things Kids Say
(Regarding confidential opinions about love)
"Love will find you, even if you are trying to hide from it. I been trying to hide from it since I was five, but the girls keep finding me."  - Dave, age 8

Welfare Requests
I have no children yet, as my husband is a truck driver and works night and day.

What the Doctors Wrote
Patient was alert and unresponsive.

Young Scientists
If conditions are not favourable, bacteria go into a period of adolescence.

Life's Bloopers was last updated on 2010 March 12