This web page is dedicated to those who remind us
that we are human and we do make mistakes.

Sometimes the funniest things in life are not those we make up but those that happen to us. We say things, write things and do things that we think are correct but somehow they come out different. Sometimes it's embarrassing for us and surprising for others, but often it's too funny to be forgotten. Here is my collection of Life's Bloopers.


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Accident Reports
As I approached the intersection a sign suddenly appeared in a place where no sign had ever appeared before, making me unable to avoid the accident.

Ad Typos
Stock up and save. Limit: one.

The Bible According to Kids
St. John, the blacksmith, dumped water on his head.

Church Bulletins
A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.

Courtroom Bloopers
Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q: How many were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there any girls?

English Misuse in Signs
In a hotel in Athens: "Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 a.m. daily."

Family Feud
Q: Name something a blind person might use.
A: A sword.

Foreign Brands
Mucos (soft drink, Japan)

Instruction Labels
On Boots children's cough medicine: "Do not drive car or operate machinery."

Newspaper Headlines
12 On Their Way to Cruise Among Dead in Plane Crash

On the Beat
"Law enforcement is not a spectator sport."

School Excuse Notes
Irving was absent this morning because he missed his bust.

Things Kids Say
(Regarding how can you tell if two adults eating dinner at a restaurant are in love?)
"See if the man has lipstick on his face."  - Sandra, age 7

Welfare Requests
I am very much annoyed to find out that you have branded my son illiterate. This is a dirty lie as I was married a week before he was born.

What the Doctors Wrote
When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room.

Young Scientists
Men are mammals and women are femammals.


 
Life's Bloopers was last updated on 2010 March 12