Accident ReportsAd Typos
An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished.
Used Cars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated? Come here first!The Bible According to Kids
Moses led the Hebrews to the Red Sea, where they made unleavened bread, which is bread made without any ingredients.Church Bulletins
The pastor will preach his farewell message, after which the choir will sing, "Break Forth Into Joy."Courtroom Bloopers
Q: The truth of the matter is that you were not an unbiased, objective witness, isn't it? You too were shot in the fracas?
A: No, sir. I was shot midway between the fracas and the navel.English Misuse in Signs
In a Copenhagen airline ticket office: "We take your bags and send them in all directions."Family Feud
Q: Name something slippery.
A: A conman.Foreign Brands
Colon Plus (liquid detergent, Spain)Instruction Labels
On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts."Newspaper Headlines
Child's Death Ruins Couple's HolidayOn the Beat
"In God we trust, all others are suspect."School Excuse Notes
My daughter was absdent yesterday because she was tired. She spent the weekend with the Marines.Things Kids Say
(Regarding how can you tell if two adults eating dinner at a restaurant are in love?)
"Just see if the man picks up the cheque. That's how you can tell if he's in love." - Bobby, age 9Welfare Requests
In accordance with your instructions, I have given birth to twins in the enclosed envelope.What the Doctors Wrote
I will be happy to go into her GI system, she seems ready and anxious.Young Scientists
All animals were here before mankind. The animals lived peacefully until mankind came along and made roads, houses, hotels and condoms.