that we are human and we do make mistakes.
Sometimes the funniest things in life are not those we make up but those that happen to us. We say things, write things and do things that we think are correct but somehow they come out different. Sometimes it's embarrassing for us and surprising for others, but often it's too funny to be forgotten. Here is my collection of Life's Bloopers.
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Accident Reports Lost: small apricot poodle. Reward. Neutered. Like one of the family.The Bible According to Kids St. John, the blacksmith, dumped water on his head.Church Bulletins The church is glad to have with us today as our guest minister the Rev. Green who has Mrs. Green with him. After the service we request that all remain in the sanctuary for the Hanging of the Greens.Courtroom Bloopers Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?English Misuse in Signs From the Soviet Weekly: "There will be a Moscow Exhibition of Arts by 150,000 Soviet Republic painters and sculptors. These were executed over the past two years."Family Feud Q: Name something with a hole in it. A: Window.Foreign Brands Superglans (car wax, Netherlands)Instruction Labels On Boots children's cough medicine: "Do not drive car or operate machinery."Newspaper Headlines Diaper Market Bottoms OutOn the Beat "The more we sweat in training, the less we bleed on the streets."School Excuse Notes Irving was absent this morning because he missed his bust.Things Kids Say (Regarding confidential opinions about love) "I'm not rushing into being in love. I'm finding fourth grade hard enough." I am forwarding my marriage certificate and my 3 children one of which is a mistake as you can see.What the Doctors Wrote The patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.Young Scientists Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and water. |