Unlucky Luke |
| They Csay if you build a better mousetrap the world will beat a G7pathway to your house. |
| If Luke was to build a better mousetrap, somebody'd Cbreed a smarter mouse. |
| If it started raining soup his Ffamily'd all have forks, |
| If G7they was to cut a woman in two, he'd get the half that Ctalks. |
|
| Unlucky FLuke, unlucky Ckid, |
| Why he G7broke into a betting shop and he lost four hundred Cquid. |
|
| Now his Cparents never loved him like they G7did his sister, Kim, |
| They could tied a kipper 'round his neck to get the Ccat to play with him. |
| And he cried the day that he was C7weened 'cause Fhe knew even then, |
| It'd be G7twenty years before he was near anything like that aCgain. |
|
| They put his Fcradle on the wardrobe near the Cdoor, |
| So the G7folks downstairs could hear him when he fell out on the Cfloor. |
|
| Now the Csaddest day of Luke's unhappy G7life, beyond a doubt, |
| Was the day he went to hospital to Cget his tonsils out. |
| He was on the operating C7theatre Ftrolley sleeping sound, |
| When a G7short-sighted nurse came past and turned the trolley C'round. |
|
| Unlucky FLuke, no wonder he Chollers, |
| His G7sick aunt died and in her will he owed her forty Cdollars. |
|
| Now Luke Cmarried Charlie's widow, a G7lady with no manners, |
| She had a figure like a hippo and Cface like a bag of spanners. |
| She told him she'd four children C7in the Fcemetery by the creek, |
| She G7forgot to tell him they was down there playin' hide and Cseek. |
|
| Unlucky FLuke, at the age of fifty-Ctwo, |
| Had a G7wife, a girlfriend and a tax demand and all three were overCdue. |
|
| Now CLuke came home one lunch time, he'd been out G7selling lucky charms, |
| He tripped over a neighbour's cat and Cfractures both his arms. |
| He said, "Hey, that's a black cat, C7why that's Flucky, I've a hunch." |
| His G7wife said, "That cat's lucky 'cause he's just had your Clunch." |
|
| Last night he Flost his pet alsation Cpup, |
| So he G7phoned up the Samaritans but the Samaritans hung Cup. |
|
| Oh CLuke, he had to go to France, his wife said, "G7I suppose you'll fly." |
| He said, "With luck like mine the plane'll crash and CI'm too young to die." |
| So he sailed there in the safety C7of an Focean-going ship, |
| But G7he got drowned when the boat went down when the plane crashed into Cit." |
|
| Unlucky FLuke, unlucky CLuke, |
| UnG7til the day he died fate was against unlucky CLu-Fuke C G7 C |