In the Papers |
| Now I've just read an interesting article, the most interesting I've ever seen, |
| It told the difference 'tween a fat girl and a girl who's lean. |
| It said both of them may smoke a cigarette, but it's one of life's natural laws, |
| That the fat girl always finishes first 'cause she takes bigger draws. |
|
| Chorus: |
| I know it's true, (I know it's true) |
| I know it's right, (I know it's right) |
| It's in the papers, (it's in the papers) |
| In black and white. |
|
| And the fashion editress tells us that the neck lines are getting real bold, |
| They're wearing the new religious look, it's sort of low and behold. |
| Now the neck lines are getting lower and the skirts go up each week, |
| I don't know where it's all leading, but I'd like to be there when they meet. |
|
| Chorus |
|
| Now a nervous new rent collector got the wind up the very first day, |
| He said, "Boss, there's a man at the buildings with a pitchfork barring my way." |
| His boss said, "But all of my tenants are very high class and well bred, |
| He was probably holding a pitchfork because he'd been making the bed." |
|
| Chorus |
|
| And the readers write to Doctor Jollygood because he helps them so, |
| If they say the suffer from acne, he says move to Walthamstow. |
| A woman wrote that a cartridge had been swallowed by her young son, |
| He said just to keep him wrapped up warm and don't point him at anyone. |
|
| Chorus |
|
| Oh yeah. It's in the papers. Extra, extra, read all about it! |
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